The "Inside" Man
Many concepts come to mind when I think about how the world has come to describe what's going on "inside" of me. From the "ghost in the machine", to the inner child, the spiritual self, the dark man, the hidden self, the real self, the id, ego, and superego, the man in the machine, the addicted personality, the sexual animal, etc.... All are attempts at conceptualizing, understanding, explaining "what" we are; analyzing, rationalizing, intellectualizing the "great mystery". All, to me, boxes that are too small to capture the full essence of what and who we are; hence, minimizing any potential for achieving our greatness!
My experience has brought me to the point of believing that we are more. Without knowing what that more is, more than anyone can really describe or analyze. And don't we often sit down and wonder what else there is to life than that which we have?! I have come to believe that the way we hold ourselves and the beliefs we carry about who and what we are shape our everyday experience very directly; from how we feel when we wake up, to how our day unfolds, and how we feel about it all when we go to bed at night.
And there's a pressing need for me to talk with you, my brothers, the men of the world, and invite you to consider who you are, and what is possible for you as you move through this time we call our lifetime!? Why? Because we are dying way too early. Because we are living in mysery way longer than we really need to. Because, I believe, our children, our world, need us as full participants in the evolution of the world. Because I believe we can move from being part of the problem (for those who would believe that), to being part of the solution. Because too many of our brothers are hurting, maiming, killing and abusing others!
The paradox is that I don't think I or anyone else is "served" by remaining unwilling to see that change is inevitable, and that it really becomes about choosing the results we want, rather than allowing things to "end up" at places and states we could have predicted, with minimal attention and clarity. After all, "if we don't change our direction, we are likely to end up where we are headed" (Chinese Proverb). And where we are headed, to me, doesn't look good right now!
If this all seems superfluous or way too complicated, allow to me to offer you a simplification:
There are only two things going on in the world: the conversation you have with yourself, and the conversation you have with the world (see "Fully Alive from 9 to 5" from Louise LeBrun at www.wel-systems.com for an expansive conversation on this concept). The thing is that the conversation you have with the world can't change until the conversation you have with yourself changes! Bummer, right? Well, not really, when you see the empowerment that can bring!
There are others, philosophers, quantum scientists, great thinkers, those who have paid attention, and most of their adult lives to observe and experience these things, who agree that "there is no out there, out there". I have come to know this. My experience is such that I know that when I want change "out there", that I get quicker and more of the results I actually want, when the conversation changes "inside" of me, where I live!
Consider this....there is no emotion that sits in a corner waiting for you to pick it up; there is no stress waiting for you in a bucket in a closet somewhere; there is no thought, waiting for you to snag it on the way through the hallway to your office...it's all inside, Man!
So my invitation to you becomes this: pay attention to the conversation that's going on inside! start paying attention to the "movements" in your body, where you live, and allow yourself to experience the signals from within that allow you to feel and to know when yes means yes, and when no means no; or when something else "tells" you "Not now", or "Later".
If, like most of my brothers, and buddies, you walk through your day wondering how you got into the mess your in, or how to avoid things getting worse, or how you can ditch this other guy that you can't stand having around you wihtout getting into a fist fight or hurting his feelings; or if you are that other guy that beats his wife or girlfriend, or slaps and otherwise physically, sexually, financially tries to control others, including young children....as long as you are breathing, it's not too late to "change"!
No matter how big or how small the "issues" of your life seem; YOU can CHANGE!
If you pay attention, become aware of what's going on inside of you, and consider the results in your life, about everything that matters to you, it becomes easier to see, to name, then act on the very things you want to change. I've never known anyone to wake up and ask:"How can I screw up my day today?" Yet, so many of our days seem to have those "results" we never would have wished for. What's going on? My guess is that we're sleeping, unaware, disengaged, disconnected from the things that are going on, and where they are going on: "inside"! Where life goes on.
We are not brought up to be individuals. We are brought up to fit in! And fitting in has its apparent benefits, but it also has its clear consequences! Fitting in, to me, means diminishing or limiting who I am, my potential. My individuality can only be expressed in a way I choose, not in a paint by numbers world we are forced into before we even have a chance at arguing about it when we're 5 years old.
If you're already walking down a path that's been carved out before you, or for you...you've got to wonder if it's "your" path?! My belief about it is that my path is not yet carved out, because I am still carving it, moment by moment, one step in front of the other.
Someone once said that not contemplating our Life for all that it can be, our potential, is like being 3/4 dead already...I believe in our potential, I know that there is much more available to me today than there ever was for me before, because I have changed, not because it wasn't possible before, but because I couldn't see it there.
Go inside! Go deep! Pay attention to what's real and true for YOU! then consider what's in your life and who's in your life and look at those simply as results of the multitude of choices you have made so far, and then consider that you can choose again, and create a life that means something to you, that holds value, and most importantly, supports and sustains who you know you can become.
creating at the rhythm of my breath,
RAY